I am not here to build your self esteem. I am not the torch to illuminate your ignorance. Most importantly, I'm not here to make friends or influence people. If you do not know me, I direct you to my first entry as a means of introducing who I am and where I'm coming from.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

San Diego love letter.

Dear San Diego,
Admittedly, I am not the best at loving prose. I wrote a love letter one time to a high school crush (Joey- if you're reading, I'm still humiliated.) Sarcastic humor I can do; lovey-dovey crap is not in my nature. I think it may be related to being German...
But, San Diego, you deserve to be told about all the amazing things you do for me each and every day. You are, and have been, my true love for the last four years. If you ever left me, I would not know how to function, because you sir, complete me.
Whenever I'm having a down week, you know just what to do to cheer me up. You literally bring the sun to my life. All I have to do is take a deep breath of your sea-filled air and I know I will make it through the day.
Sometimes I fall in lust with other cities, but when I come back to you, you welcome me with open arms and show me that no matter how wonderful anywhere else would be, you are by far superior and strong enough to accept my wondering eye.
Your attitude is always tolerant of my faults and you have always provided for me both spiritually and economically.
You are full of the life I have built here as a "real" grownup. If Santa Barbara was my high school sweetheart, you are my steady and committed soulmate. I know when I'm with you there is nothing I can do that you won't accept and repair without judgment.
As I go through this life, please keep holding my hand and walking along with me, because you are there in the good times and I can always count on you in the bad times. You have taught me more than I ever thought I could learn, and you keep opening my eyes everyday to life.
I love you San Diego.
Mrs. Bauer

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Life Update.

Hello all.
I know, I said I was back in early November. But then I went MIA for another couple of months. I did not make time for the blog. Overall, the last few months of 2010 was a very scattered me. 2011 is already looking better as far as getting my life in order.
To start this new year out, I will update you on the current events of my life. These are in no particular order of importance other then work is the single most important thing to me in life. So that is at the top, the rest follow as they popped into my head.
Investment Gurus- Life at the office is great. It took me about six months to gain some ground on what I wanted out of this career. Now I know. 2011 is looking to be a very successful year.
The Boyz- All excellent still. They make a challenging job more than fun. As a side note, my Mom got me this sign that says "Behind every successful woman is herself." I think it's cute. But the reality is, the Boyz have already helped me more than I deserve. Whether it be explaining the simplest concept, giving me people to call, or even taking me on appointments. When I get where I'm going, I certainly won't have done it alone.
Tucker Max- Currently re-obsessing about my fav internet bachelor. I just wish he would realize soon he is my soulmate. I will be filling out his dating application (after I get back on the health train which is discussed next).
Health- I am currently getting that part of my life back in order. I put on what we so fondly call the "AXA 15". Luckily, it wasn't actually 15 (otherwise, being a midget, I would look morbidly obese). I did however stop working out and eat as if I was a grizzly bear about to hibernate. Like really. Why I thought it was okay to consumer 5000 calories of processed food and beer a day is beyond me. I've put the kibosh on the situation and have begun Operation Anorexia as of last week. I will be back into fighting shape soon. Can't wait to waive to my future ex-boyfriends out on Coronado again rather than hang my head in chubby shame like today.
Jersey Shore- Vinny is the man. Why does he get hotter every season? Why do I continue to watch this? And why would I consider having an affair on Tucker Max with The Situation?
Taylor Swift (yes I'm digressing)- Currently listening. Love that song "Mine". Makes me want to register for eharmony and find my faux soulmate. But then the song ends ever so abruptly. Perhaps there is a correlation?
Men- Mostly just spinster complaints. I am seriously considering getting Snooki and the Situation (already named cats courtesy of N-dizzle) and declaring defeat. The other day I met with a networking cohort and she was asking me about personal things. When I told her I was single, she gave me this pity look (her bitch version of the Dr. Drew pity look on Celebrity Rehap). I kid you not. Full on sideways concerned pouty lips. It was like this look of "oh poor girl, can't land a man". Then she went on for like five minutes about how I should not worry and that "he is out there". I hadn't started worrying until she said not to worry. I almost interrupted her to point out that perhaps "he is not out there" but then she looked so hopeful and I could tell she was smugly complimenting herself on what a good Samaritan she was for "cheering up the soon-to-be -spinster with twelve cats". Mostly my largest problem is this: I suffer from constant crush resuscitation. Come on girls- you know to what I'm referring. You convince yourself you are DONE with what's-his-name. He's rubbish. Has all sorts of "issues" most of which encompass the general feeling of "he's just not that into you." Then, like a dead phoenix rising from the ashes, he recaptures your original affections. Then he inevitably disappoints you by being himself (i.e. not Jack Bauer) and the cycle repeats. While this seems like a cycle of insanity- I mainly blame boredom. I only repeat these cycles because I don't have anyone new to throw into the rotation. In sum, I wanted to stop this woman from so eagerly assuring me. Because, in the end I am an optimist. I know what I want. I may not know "who" it is yet, but I know it exists. I've seen it. If it's one thing I'm good at it's identifying what I want and going for it.
The Book-Roary and I have an idea. It is awesome. Full of hilariousness and anecdotes. I'm viewing it as therapy (much like the blog). Updates as we develop the idea more. For now, if that horrendous "Eat, Pray, Love" book can be a bestseller and a movie so bad I wanted to claw my own eyes out with a toothpick, I think we might have a real shot at an actually good read.
Californication- Love that show. So glad Hank Moody is back.
That is all for now. May the force be with you. Happy New Year to you all!